More and more people are getting their Medic Alert data tattooed right on their wrists. Just to give themselves an unfair advantage. They say Death is really pissed about this. It’s affecting his quota and cutting into his bonus.
According to the Center for Disease Control and Prevention, well over 120 million people annually require emergency responders. They require immediate on-site medical treatment before or during transport to the hospital. A frightening percentage of them die because they are in no shape to tell responders about their medical conditions. While Death sits in the back of the ambulance, smirking, and calculating his commission.
While there are medication errors, procedures not done in time and a host of other problems that simply would not arise if EMT’s had the correct information about you.
Medic Alert IDs on both bracelets and necklaces were created decades ago to try and counteract this problem, but a recent small study quoted in Diabetic Health shows that about 60% of people who have the bracelets or necklaces, don’t wear them. And millions more who need them don’t even have them. That usually humorless old bastard Death is always amused at this.
There are as many excuses as there are people. Many find the design too clunky. Many forget. The jewelry broke, and they never got a replacement. The dog ate it.
However, more and more people, who love to imagine Death having a shit fit, are getting their medical data tattooed on their wrists. People use designs like the jewelry so EMT’s will spot it easier. And they cleverly leave a bit of room so they can add on other conditions as they occur.
Some data you should include would be whether you have diabetes or have one of the scores of other conditions that require special handling. Writing out allergies to drugs could save your life and even your blood could give the EMT’s those few crucial moments that can mean the difference between life and death.
For decades the military has put this kind of info on soldiers, usually on the rib cage under the armpit, which is known as The Meat Tag. But more and more civilians are following the practice with essential data inked on their wrists, in plain sight.
So if you have a condition that requires special care, and you’d like to give Death a swift hoof to the ghoulies, see about getting a medic alert tattoo.
When you are considering designs, consider this - most EMT’s are not trained to look for tattoos, so try to make yours as much like a real bracelet as possible. And if you listen carefully, you can hear Death mumbling curses as he walks away, empty-handed.